The Unseen Work of Caregivers

This November is National Family Caregivers Month, a time to honor the millions of people who dedicate themselves to supporting their loved ones.

We often see the visible tasks of caregiving: the rides to the doctor, the picking up of prescriptions, the help with groceries. But behind these actions is a massive, complex, and often invisible framework of support—what we call "The Unseen Work."

This unseen work is the 24/7, high-stakes mental and emotional load that defines the modern caregiving experience. It’s a role of profound dedication, and it deserves to be seen, acknowledged, and supported.

The Iceberg of Caregiving

What we see—the visible tasks—is just the tip of the iceberg. The unseen work is everything beneath the surface.

• The Emotional Work: This is the act of being the "strong one." It’s managing a loved one's anxiety, frustration, or depression while processing one's own grief and stress. It’s providing constant reassurance, celebrating small victories, and finding the patience to answer the same question for the tenth time.

• The Logistical Work: This is the job of a high-level care coordinator. It’s scheduling (and rescheduling) multiple doctor's appointments, managing conflicting medication schedules, coordinating with home health aides, and ensuring the transportation for all of it is in place.

• The Advocacy Work: This is the role of the fierce protector. It’s the caregiver who sits in the doctor's office, taking meticulous notes and asking tough questions. It’s advocating for a second opinion, questioning a new medication, or fighting for the right services to ensure their loved one's needs and wishes are respected.

• The Financial Work: This is the job of the
  bookkeeper and analyst. It’s navigating the labyrinth of Medicare, Medicaid, and private insurance. It’s paying bills, managing a loved one's estate, and researching benefits or local programs that could help offset costs.

• The Social Work: This is the work of being the family switchboard. It’s updating other family members, managing differing opinions on care, and often, bearing the sole responsibility for making the hard decisions. It’s also sacrificing one's own social life, as the demands of caregiving can be isolating.

Making the Invisible, Visible

The danger of this work being unseen is that the caregiver's own needs are often the first to be ignored. According to the Caregiving Action Network, a significant percentage of family caregivers report feeling isolated, highly stressed, and burned out.

This November, our goal is to make this work visible.

How You Can Support a Caregiver

If someone in your life is a caregiver, the most powerful way to show your gratitude is to help lighten their unseen load.

1. Be Specific With Your Help. Instead of "Let me know if you need anything," say, "I'm bringing you dinner on Tuesday" or "I have a few free hours on Saturday. Can I sit with Mom so you can get out?"

2. Give the Gift of Time. Respite is the most requested and least utilized resource for caregivers. Offer to take over for a few hours.

3. Take a Task Off Their Plate. Don't just ask—do. Take on one specific, unseen task. Say, "I'm going to the pharmacy, what prescriptions can I pick up?" or "Send me the bills, I'll organize them and make a list of what's due."

4. Just Listen. Create a safe space for them to vent, cry, or talk about something other than caregiving. Listen without offering judgment or unsolicited advice.

5. Acknowledge Their Work. Simply saying, "I see how hard you are working to coordinate everything, and I appreciate you," can be incredibly validating.

At HealthSense, our nurse-led care managers are experts in navigating this iceberg. We are here to support the entire family—by coordinating services, providing expert advocacy, and creating a plan that gives caregivers the one thing they need most: peace of mind.